Wednesday, January 14, 2015

Top 5 Death Battles I want to See

Ah Death Battle, the brutal Internet series where two fictional characters of similar caliber duke it out! Whether it be the tenacious Super Saiyan against the Man of Steel, the Boy who Lived against the Jedi that offed Darth Vader or even Nintendo's pink puffball against Dragon Ball's deadliest villain, Wiz and Boomstick have been analyzing combatants and trolling fanboys for five whole years! But as with many series like Epic Rap Battles of History, people have been requesting many battles for them to bring to life and that's what I'm doing today. Like what the experts do, the rules are simple:

  1. Combatants possess no non-canon knowledge of each other.
  2. Personality restraints from killing are removed.
  3. All other character traits, tactics and attributes are not removed, and largely attempted to be represented faithfully.
  4. Research sources are generally determined equally unless specified.
So, let's get started!

5. Vector the Crocodile vs Leatherhead
Now I'm not just saying this can happen just because they're both reptiles, I'm saying this because both franchises feature anthropomorphic animal characters & a human villain and both characters have quite a lot of strength. The plot for this would be that the Chaotix are hired by Shredder to take down Leatherhead and Vector is the only one that can stop him. This could easily be a very balanced battle that could tick off either the Sonic fanboys or the Turtles fanbase. Ah who cares!

4. Monkey D Luffy vs Jack Sparrow
Luffy vs Popeye was enough, but how about Luffy against a LIVE-ACTION pirate. With Straw Hat's powers of the Gum-Gum Fruit, he could easily have the upper hand and tell Jack who is the true king of the pirates! Anyway, the Black Pearl crew assault a fancy ship known as the S.S. Macbeth only to find the Strawhat Pirates also onboard. There, that good enough?

3. Hercules vs Kratos
Now before you ask which Herc, I'm leaning towards the Disney version as I'm more familiar with that one and HE CAN PUNCH HADES INTO THE RIVER STYX WITHOUT BREAKING A SWEAT! As for the plot, former God of War Ares makes a bet with Hades to see which one of their enemies is more powerful. Now this is a battle rich with anger and satanic hormones!

2. Teen Titans vs Ginyu Force
Five vs five, my kind of brawl. Angered over his loss against Goku, Frieza decides to take out his rage on someone else and that would be the Teen Titans! The order would go as so:
  • Beast Boy vs Guldo
  • Starfire vs Recoome
  • Robin and Cyborg vs Jeice and Burter
  • Raven vs Ginyu
Speaking of Dragon Ball Z.....

1. Goku vs Ryu
After Goku vs Superman, DBZ fanboys were aflurry with rage. And then Kirby vs Buu came along and made them even more angry. So the only way they can redeem themselves is pit Goku against another fictional martial artist, specifically the iconic protagonist of Street Fighter. This could easily be the most insanest fight ever and bring back more past combatants after what happened in Batman vs Captain America. And even though it's not real, please bring in Super Saiyan 5!

Well, this was a long one but it was worth it!

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