Doggy: Now this is a shocker. Four pizza-eating kung fu mutant ninja turtles on Nickelodeon. Yep, it's true. And those turtles are well, the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles. Now before we get on with it, lemme give you a little backstory on the TV turtles.
Apparently, these kids started their lives on home entertainment in 1987 as a family-friendly animated series after their days as a dark and gritty Indie comic. Several changes had to be made like giving them a brighter tone, catchphrases, love of pizza and multicolored bandanas as they all wore red in the comics. It went on for almost a decade, 10 seasons, tons of toys, three live action movies with them made by the Muppet guy, Jim Henson and two Japanese movies which I guess they're called OVAs.
Following the end of the cartoon's run, there was a live-action show made by the Power Rangers that completely derailed their fame. Why? Because of that Shinobi chick, Venus De Milo.
It would take a couple years to get our favorite heroes in a half shell back on track with another cartoon in 2003 on the FoxBox and then 4kids. Along with that, there was the Turtles' first CGI movie released by Warner Bros in 2007. The new cartoon went on until 2009 with a movie celebrating their 25th anniverseray.
Splinter: Ah, they grow up so fast. I'll just go over there for a second.
Doggy: After that, Nick got the rights to any future Turtles cartoon. And that's where this newest one comes in!
So the show begins with Hamato Yoshi, the greatest warrior in a martial arts clan called the Foot. Until one day his nemesis Oruko Saki challenges him to a duel for everything, including the love of a woman. Yoshi won, gets laid and then loses her and his daughter. Fleeing to the sewers of New York, he discovers four turtles covered in this toxic ooze. They get mutated, the turtles in human and not actually flesh and blood, they're still turtles and Hamato turns into a rat. He names them after the great Renaissance artists and trains them in the art of Ninjitsu.
A couple years later I think, the father of teenage April O'Neil, who isn't wearing the yellow jumpsuit this time and is not a reporter, is captured by the Kraang, an evil race of brain aliens that seek to take over the world.
M. Bison: Of course!
Doggy: Anyway, she meets the turtles and they promise to help her find her daddy and stop the aliens. Meanwhile, Oruko Saki, now called the Shredder which is the dumbest name any villain can come up with, hunts down Splinter and wants him and the turtles dead! So instead of a rhino and warthog at his side, he mutates two of his henchmen into a bulldog and a fish. There were a few differences from the originals like Mikey no longer says "Cowabunga" and now shouts "Booyakasha".
There was also voice actors like two actors I never heard of Leonardo and Michelangelo, Yakko Warner as Donatello, who previously voiced Raphael in the original cartoon. Speaking of Raph, he is voiced by Bilbo Baggins from Lord of the Rings. As for the rest, they are as followed. Ahem.
Some Chinese guy I also never heard of a Splinter, Tinker Bell as April, Captain Gantu from Lilo and Stitch as Shredhead and Raphael from the 2007 movie as the aliens. They also got Baxter Stockman back and we have no word on where Casey Jones is right now. Parents, save your money on Wave 1 the classic figures. Trust me, your Turtle-obsessed kids will be crying their brains out. If you'll excuse me, I gotta go get them for Conroy's birthday.
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