One night ago, my brother Jack almost died when he went to homecoming at St. Juliana. When he walked in the door, girls toppled him in their attempt to get him to dance! They also wanted his phone number. I conducted a short interview with Jack about his feelings about the dance:
Q: So Jack, what were your feelings about the dance?
A: First, peasant, you will not refer to me as Jack! I am Stormaggedon, Dark Lord of All. Secondly, the dance was unspeakably terrible and I wish to throw it into a BURNING lake of FLAMES!
Q: Okay, Stormaggedon, what your other feelings? Were the girls cute? Did you say "BLASPHEMY!" when they approached?
A: I dislike these girls. They are Justin Bieber fans.
Q: How many girls approached you?
A: It was OVER 9,000!! (screaming!)
Q: Why are you so loud and weird?
A: My old teacher Mrs. Marshall says weird is good!
Q: Any final thoughts?
A: Yes, I will now vaporize you. BECAUSE I'M A MONKEY
End: You know what they say, "With great weirdness comes great responsibility!" *stole it from Spiderman, changed it*